See that little guy in the front? That’s me. I’ve felt like him for weeks now. It’s come across even here on the blog now and then. I’ve been grumpy and wow, my actual posts on writing slowed to a crawl.
I’ve mentioned here that I don’t have a lot of writing circulating and it’s unbelievable– not like me at all. But… I’ve also been focusing heavily on the book length manuscript and feel that’s more important for right now.
Anyway, the long-term mood boils down to the things I’ve let pile up. I didn’t know that until yesterday.
You see, I had to drive one of my kids to yet another activity, but I was actually going to have a bit of time to myself while she was busy. I took three chapters of my critique partner’s work with me along with my current chapter and planned to sit in B&N after getting lunch.
I couldn’t pick a place to eat.
I drove around for half an hour. When I can’t decide on food easily, something’s up man.
I. Love. To. Eat.
Most of us know when we reach the point where we’re unable to make a simple decision, it’s time to figure out the problem. (Long day– ignore grammar issue here. )
So, I finally stopped at this great place that has a gathering of antique booths and a cafe. I order, sit down to work and get this phone call that really upset me. Seems my quiet writing hours to myself weren’t going to happen after all. There was a family thing going on for Labor Day that I didn’t know about. I needed to work and instead got an earful about choosing to “stay home” over barbecue. I didn’t even know about the thing.
Thing is, I get tired of people not realizing that my work is important to me. No, it’s not to the point where I can support my family with it, but I am working on that. (g)
I know this particular family member didn’t mean anything, but that mood of mine hit me hard. I may have been a little rude when I did later arrive at the thing. It’s not that I don’t love being around them, I do. I just really needed those three quiet hours to catch up.
All people do this. They think that I write all the time so why can’t I take the time for “them” that day. Problem is… I know and love a lot of “thems.” heh heh
So after the phone call, my concentration was smashed– my writing turned to crap and I wasn’t doing my CP any good, so I got up to look for a new wine rack. Instead I saw this sign about prioritizing.
Hey, there was an idea.
You see, all those little fishies behind me have been multiplying. They are the things I need to do. Things I’ve let go. They’ve been sitting on my shoulders, chasing me, interrupting my sleep. They are the many kid’s activities I have to remember (completely forgot an ortho appointment for one child– oops) and the different meetings and lunch invitations I juggle– the ones I feel bad about turning down. It’s a couple of icky family arguments. It’s the way my hand seizes up so I can’t type and the fact that my newsletter for my local RWA chapter is seriously due. It’s the call from the fourth grade teacher just one week into school about certain recurring issues… you get the drift.
Prioritizing sounded good. I decided to make a list. I’ve been dealing with the mental one, but writing it down can sometimes help to organize the items into workable solutions.
This list ranges from biggies like finally finishing home projects, to things like organizing my closet because it’s scary– I couldn’t find anything in that mess yesterday– to dealing with my office because I have stacks of stuff around me in there and yes, apparently I’m a bit claustrophobic and can’t focus with chaos everywhere.
So, list in hand, I see what’s going on.
Big, freaking list. I needed to catch some stuff up and just get items off that list. Time to shorten it, baby. That’s it. Only action would lessen the load and only I could take that action.
Since I was too tired for the heavy action items last night, I sat down and critiqued those three chapters– yay– just have to type in the comments which I’m sure that particular CP is going to be thrilled to hear aren’t many. Nice, polished work there!
And today, I took the day off. From the computer. Didn’t even check on the store.
I tackled three huge projects. I took four, yes four, hours to clear out the closet, dresser, to pull out everything I no longer wear/doesn’t fit and to put all the “keeping” clothes back. I ended up with four garbage bags full of clothes to donate and two for trash– I uh, keep everything –even jeans with huge, gaping holes and yes, those went into the trash.
(Okay. A part of that hour count was spent on the phone with a teacher, then having a sit down with the hubby over what actions to take now with that loving, wonderful and too TALKATIVE child of mine. )
I also have this huge pantry that was probably the biggest selling point of this house for me. (g) But it was bad. Didn’t know what I had in there since everything was crammed into every available space. The kids had dropped cereal, chips or other unidentifiable objects onto the floor of it, and apparently some stuff has been in there too long. Did you know there are “best if used by” dates on tomato sauce?? More loads for the trash can…
Then, I caught up the laundry. Also made up the dinner menu for the next week along with the grocery list. (Planning ahead eases up writing time, too!)
And then… yes, I was on a huge roll… after doing that, I pulled everything out of the fridge, including the shelves and drawers. I washed them in hot, soapy water, and went through everything.
Tomorrow, I’m tackling my office. Should only take a couple of hours and then I made a deal with the family. I’m sinking into the work again. This time, they need to help me more and not let things get so crazy. Dropped food should be picked up immediately, etc. Sounds simple, yes, but I’m a woman immersed in reality with kids, a huge extended family, lots of wonderful friends, work… wait.
Life. That’s it. (g)
Still gonna try. Felt good crossing so many biggies off that list today. Already the mind is more clear. There is power in writing lists down and crossing completed items off. Think I’ll make this a regular practice.